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Poop
Dec 9, 2011 4:16:47 GMT -5
Post by Barack Obama on Dec 9, 2011 4:16:47 GMT -5
It is 3:14am central time.
I had to share this with someone. I woke up because I had to take a shit. So I climbed down my loft, went to the foyers of my dorm, went to the toilet room, and took a shit.
Now this was no normal shit. It slid out of my asshole as if my asshole's rims were made of lube. I had never experienced anything like it before. I swear there is a reasonable chance it was an unnatural occurrence, a slippage designed by the Lord himself.
After I took my shit, I got some toilet paper to wipe my ass and lo and behold, when I glanced at my toilet paper, there was nothing. No streak. No brown stuff. No Firefox7. Nothing. I leaned in to smell it and it smelt like...toilet paper? I wiped my ass again to make sure I didn't just hallucinate the wipage of my ass. I made sure I was not dreaming by trying to force a nude Sasha Cohen to appear in front of me. Needless to say, it did not happen. I was not dreaming. I pulled my toilet paper and leaned in once more to smell it. *Sniff*...toilet paper.
And thus I concluded my trip to the johndude this morning was nothing short of a miracle, a miracle that proves that God had decided to take a more active role in humanity, a miracle that sends a message to soul, a message that says "God is here, God is alive, and God is willing."
I welcome God back into existence.
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Poop
Dec 9, 2011 5:12:46 GMT -5
Post by ownagemuch on Dec 9, 2011 5:12:46 GMT -5
Holy shit. No pun intended.
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Poop
Dec 17, 2011 15:40:23 GMT -5
Post by YungCereal on Dec 17, 2011 15:40:23 GMT -5
ಠ_ಠ
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Poop
Dec 21, 2011 15:25:55 GMT -5
Post by vampiric on Dec 21, 2011 15:25:55 GMT -5
This has happened to me multiple times.
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Poop
Dec 21, 2011 20:25:18 GMT -5
Post by Mitt Romney on Dec 21, 2011 20:25:18 GMT -5
I love you Lam.
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Poop
Dec 21, 2011 22:17:33 GMT -5
Post by Nicholas Flare on Dec 21, 2011 22:17:33 GMT -5
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Poop
Dec 23, 2011 8:21:43 GMT -5
Post by gazea on Dec 23, 2011 8:21:43 GMT -5
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Poop
Mar 1, 2014 4:41:28 GMT -5
Post by ownagemuch on Mar 1, 2014 4:41:28 GMT -5
I JUST DID THIS SHIT WOW I'VE BEEN BLESSED
also it smelled like jalapeƱos lol
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Poop
Mar 12, 2014 19:42:09 GMT -5
Post by Mitt Romney on Mar 12, 2014 19:42:09 GMT -5
I DID THIS TOO BUT FF CAME OUT OF MY ASSHOLE
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